Tag Archives: flat

Six Puns Day Five Hundred Forty: Laptops

“Here’s the key to this company: it loves to screen its employees, so make sure you don’t fold,” said the hiring manager. “In a clamshell, make sure you have your pitch down flat. If you have any questions don’t be … Continue reading

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Six Puns Day Five Hundred Twenty One: Steam Rollers

The scientist rode all the way to his flat to grab a roll and write a letter about his findings to his colleagues. He hoped it would gain traction and pave the way for new discoveries (or at least smoke … Continue reading

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Six Puns Day Four Hundred Eight: Nematodes

Trying to worm your way out of a round debate? Don’t want it to soil your reputation? Well no matter how well you style it, you’re going to want to have a secondary plan. Find a flat in France, and … Continue reading

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Six Puns Day Three Hundred Thirty Six: Pancakes

“We don’t do things like that ’round here,” said the coach in a flat tone. “She can fry her brain looking at old game footage, but her performance will ultimately depend on how she stacks up against the other players–and … Continue reading

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Six Puns Day Three Hundred Thirty Five: Origami

Don’t be a square, order that pay-per view soon so that you don’t have to crane your neck into the neighbor’s flat to see all the action of that live poker game. I really hope our star contender doesn’t fold.

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Six Puns Day Two Hundred Seventy Five: Horse Racing

You have to harness the power of the sun if you want to bake thorough bread. If you didn’t add a cup of yeast to it the dough, the bread will be flat. But that’s no reason to be sulky, you’ll … Continue reading

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Six Puns Day Two Hundred Seventy Three: Types of Paint

I was lead to believe that to temper a lengthy school day I could read a primer from start to finish. It was a bad idea, I think I felt my own eyes gloss over. I’m not going to say … Continue reading

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Six Puns Day Two Hundred Sixty Six: Screws

Don’t be cross, there’s one way to get to the Oval Office in seconds flat: just tell the driver to pick you up and swing ’round to the front.

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Six Puns Day Two Hundred Seven: Worms

You wouldn’t want to soil your reputation by being known as a spineless coward, now would you? Tape up those hands, and get the job done in an hour flat–I want to see blood. Pumped back into the patient, that is…I mean, … Continue reading

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Six Puns Day One Hundred Seventy Six: Flip Flops

The band was on the sand all ready to perform at the beach, they had towed their equipment with them and they knew their set flat. The stage looked all right, except for a few fallen arches, something the set-up crew was, well, … Continue reading

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