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Tag Archives: puns
“I hope you will take stock in our collective futures, our interests are what bond us together,” said one of the college students. “That’s a fair assessment of the situation,” replied the Professor. “I guess the feeling is mutual.”
Nothing will sink her restaurants or break her bars, she’s got enough establishments in her name to span her entire career. Well, at least that’s what she claimed at the power lunch, it was her turn and she spoke pretty … Continue reading
“I’d like to make a deposit,” said the jazz fusion musician to the bank teller. “You may have misunderstood me about intrusions to my account and the liquid assets therein. I said it meant a lot to me.” “That’s no problem,” … Continue reading
“You shouldn’t base what you think about our news foundation solely by a column written by our anchor,” said the publicist, “Our reporting will have you beam with pride and it will gain your full support.”
If your mother wants to tell you to take money and another article of wool clothing with you, let her. There’s no reason to go to another address without a dime and looking any less than an epic ram. For … Continue reading
“Don’t scream until you’re hoarse, shoo away your hecklers by using stilted dialogue in your keystone speech,” said Mary, the campaign advisor. “You will gain support that will span all over the board and put you ahead of the curve.”
“That punk will fish for sole and blues using all types of electronic equipment,” said the fisherman. “That type of stuff should be illegal, especially in this country. It’s like he has no other alternative.”
“In order to drum up support for our current president, he needs to be a kind of symbol to the people,” said the adviser. “He has to stick it to the opposition and chime in when necessary: that way he … Continue reading
If one hops to the occasion, he or she can make the next competitor pale and seem mild in comparison, even in the most bitter of competitions. So don’t shy away: a little confidence will cure what ails you.